Listening to: An ugly fact of life - Explosions in the sky (amazing song)
Why do we get up everyday? If all your debts were paid off. If all your chores and affairs were put to rest. If all your relationships were made straight. If all those things were laid to rest. Would I still need to get up every morning? This blog by no means is a call for help. Or a way to seek attention. Although this is posted publicly and for some of you (who ever you are) who read this. I'm just putting my thoughts out there. For reasons I don't know why. But maybe more so for accountablity.
But lately this summer has been one I would like to lay put away hidden in the bookshelves collecting dust. Right now I'm on a path I don't know where it leads. I've made plans, but we all know that we can all make plans, but the Lord determines his/her steps. I've been having a rough time adjusting to leading my peers at work. Finding the respect I feel I should be granted. I feel in some sorts abandoned this summer. So I've been folding the cards I hold. In some aspects I've isolated myself and granted the honesty of my heart to be shadowed with ignorance. At this point ignorance would be bliss. But truth be known I'm just fooling myself. I just want to say that this is another valley I'm going through. But I feel as if thats just a cop out to why I am here running through the forest.
As busy as I am and distracted from my own self destruction. I'd rather not get up. I've been losing my step. I've missed a couple exits along the way. And this maze has gotten out of control.
I'm not sorry for myself or wallowing in my sorrow. But I'm just wondering why this part of life which has been allowed to me. Will help me later down the road. Everything happens for a reason right?
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2 comments:
One should never expect respect to be granted by another unless one has fully earned that respect.
I suppose the question is: "Have your EARNED your underlings respect?"
By the sounds of it, you have not.
I feel to some I have. Some have no clue. But my angst is just that I find it hard to be promoted from within. It's almost far easier to come into a new work enviroment. You work together. But once pay raise comes into play. Orders are passed down. It becomes almost harder to swollow. It goes both ways.
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